Hepa and me had flown to LA to see the Bloody Beetroots perform; it was a random spur of moment trip that started of as a joke then next thing you know we’re booking flights.   I was on the net just fucking around when I saw that Coachella was on during our time in LA.

It didn’t take much persuasion to get Hepa to agree, I mean Jay-Z was playing, Jay fucking Z. 

We were staying at a Hostel on Hollywood boulevard and had to wake up at 4am to catch the bus from a hotel near by.

The bus trip to Indio was long and mediocre, I just remember the guy organizing the bus trip offering juice and me replying with the classic Dave Chappelle line “”what the fuck is juice?” and Hepa having a laughing fit due to the look on the guys face.  

Once we arrived at our destination we had to walk across a field to where they were checking tickets and searching bags.   Hepa and me both had big suitcases which was a pretty shit idea considering we were camping while at Coachella.   I had some young guy search my bag that did a half assed job and missed two bottles of Gray Goose I had stashed.   Hepa had a 1.5L bottle of Jagermeister taken by some old guy whose main purpose in life was to be the biggest cunt on the planet.  

After this it sucked more dick then Jenna Jamison.   We were completely lost.   All I could see was an over populated tent city.   Thankfully we met some random guy on a golf cart who took us to where we needed to collect our camping supplies.   We had got tickets that included a campsite, tent, sleeping bags all the stuff you need so we were set.   Now we had to find the campsite that was like a good 2 or 3 kilometers away in the desert sun, dragging my heavy ass suitcase it sucked! 

We finally got there set up the tent and made our way to the stages.   First act of the day was Wale on the main stage.   He was taking forever to start and the crowd was getting restless, they started chanting “BULLSHIT”.   In our boredom we started talking to people around us and immediately because of our fucked up accents asked where we were from?   When we replied New Zealand some kid wearing and LA hat spun around and said “no shit, me to” he was from Auckland and living in LA for school.  

Eventually Wale started before a riot did and he was even pretty good.   I think we spent the rest of the day in one of the big marquee tents raging to DJ’s like Wolfgang Gartner and Proxy.  

End of day one was amazing we headed back to the main stage to catch them Crooked Vultures, LCD sound system and the highlight I think Jay-Z.   Just before Jay-Z started some chick climbed up on a guy’s shoulders right in front of us.   Hepa was not taking this shit he started to Boo and in turn so did the rest of the crowd.   This chick got booed right of that guys shoulders and as she walked past us muttered, “fuck this” and left.    Jay-Z was fucking epic, I think I rapped every single word and I’m pretty sure Hepa cried.   He even brought Beyonce out and she did the chorus to forever young.

Day two, we woke up and the tent was ridiculously hot, like a sauna.   I started the day with a Gray Goose and Monster and waited for Hepa to wake up.   Some guys were walking around selling acid and weed so I decided to talk to them

“Got any ecstasy?”

“Nah bud If I did I could probably buy a house after this weekend, everyone’s looking for that shit”.  

We had some how put our tent on the edge of these middle aged fuck heads camp sight and they were telling me to move the tent.   I just kind of looked at them and continued drinking my Gray Goose and Monster.   Eventually they waved down some guy on a 4-wheeler motorbike who was some kind of security guard and he forced us to move.   The nerve of these people who do they think they are.   

Breakfast was some shitty fast food from one of the many fine food stalls scattered across Coachella.   It was still early no acts had started yet so we decided to check out some of the various tents around the place.   We found a DJ scratch academy tent where some guy showed us how to scratch a record, was pretty cool.   We went back to the marquee from the day before where we got our first glimpse of Yelawolf (unknown to us that time), also Dirty South and Die Antwood.  

We met this random Australian guy named Paul and started kicking around with him.  He was really keen to see MGMT so we tagged along but after about 10 minutes we realized it was shit and moved on.   The plan was to go see Major Lazer but after a quick detour to check out David Guetta we didn’t end up leaving.   After this we chilled out for a bit, got some beers, something to eat and Paul gave us a detailed explanation of the saying “keen as mustard”.   Back to the marquee we went to See two many DJ’s.   I have to say I wasn’t expecting too much but they absolutely killed it one of the best DJ acts I’ve ever seen.

Again we woke up in the sauna tent and I again started the day with a Gray goose and monster.   First act of the day was B.O.B. that dude is a crazy performer jumping round like a mad man and ripping shit on the guitar I was impressed.   De La Soul came on after him, I hadn’t listened to too much of their stuff but enjoyed it.   We were second row from the front and when plug one came to slap hands with the crowd I accidently smacked his microphone, which didn’t seem to faze him too much.   At least he didn’t punch me in the face.  

After this Hepa went and passed out in the middle of a field while I went to see Julian Casablancas (the lead singer of the strokes, for those who don’t know).   The Strokes are one of my favorite bands so no way was I missing this.  

Once I got back to Hepa people had been walking past and asking if he was ok.   He did look a bit fucked so we just chilled on the grass outside one of the marquees.   The marquee, all of a sudden started to come alive with lasers and electro music mixed with a female English accent.   I got up to have a look and found a blond woman on stage.   She was awesome; the light show mixed with the music was amazing.   This was my introduction to English singer little boots.

This was the last day of Coachella and the last act was the Gorillaz, another one of my favorite bands.   I was hooked on these guys the first time I heard the song Clint Eastwood.   We walked over while whatever shit band playing was finishing up.   I think we had to sit around for about an hour while the Gorillaz set up.   While waiting we sat with a group of Americans who were in aw at the way we talked.   Some guy threw up a beach ball that came straight down at me and when I smacked it away it landed right in the middle where they run the cables for the stage and is fenced off from the public.   Everyone around booed me, wicked!   Anyways fuck those people and their beach ball.

 Gorillaz started and I was in a trance, this was beyond words.   De La Soul came out to do Superfast Jellyfish and Feel Good Inc, that shit went off!   As I stood there enjoying this folly of musical brilliance something suddenly came sliding over the back off my head and landed at my feet.   I was shocked to look down and see a good-looking brunette staring back at me; I immediately reached down and picked her up.   Still kind of confused about what just happened she laughed and simply said “nice catch”.   Before I could finish asking if she was ok she had pulled a can of beer from her purse, chugged it back then proceeded to pack, light and smoke a cone.   I was impressed to say the least she even lived by the rule puff puff pass.   

After the Gorillaz we got back to the bus that had brought us to Coachella.   We didn’t even bother with the tent we just left it erected in the middle of a field.   The last 3 days had completely drained me and I passed out for the whole trip back to Hollywood.   It was good being back indoor and I hate to say it but hadn’t showered in 3 days, so a warm shower was more then welcoming.   Needless to say if you have the opportunity to experience Coachella do not pass it up, you will not regret it.   Just don’t take a big ass suitcase.

I had flown over to Canada from Singapore to meet up with my good buddy Jay and do some snowboarding.   He was living in a small town called Rossland about 8 hours drive from Vancouver.   Pretty much all it had was Mountain and a subway, the sandwiches not the trains.

Another one of my mates Reuben was doing a snowboard instructors course at Big White so I had decided to head over for the weekend.   Jay and me had just been to Las Vegas so he was out of cash and decided to stay in Rossland.  

I had hired an F150 truck, which was badass.   I felt like an American redneck just needed some chewing tobacco and a rifle.   The drive too big white was amazing.   The Canadian countryside is beautiful and the weather was perfect, I even had to stop to check out a frozen lake and take in some of the freshest air the world can offer. 

Arriving at Big White village I immediately got lost and almost drove onto a ski field.   The village is built around the ski field and has a supermarket, snowboarding and ski shops plus a number of bars and restaurants.   There is a gondola that takes you from the car park and beginner’s fields at the bottom through the middle of 4 story apartment buildings to the top where the main chairlifts and shops are.   You can even ride right to your back door at the end of the day.   

Eventually I found Reuben’s apartment building.   He was working so I decided to go for a board.   It seemed that everyone that worked on the mountain was from Australia.   They all had their name and where they were from on a tag on their jacket.   One of girls selling lift passes was from Wellington so I had to give her props.   The day was cloudy and a little wet but the riding was awesome I think I spent the day hoping through trees and straight lining down the freshly groomed trails. I remember watching a guy skiing across a trail with his groceries in hand and thinking “what the fuck?”

When the lifts closed I headed back to the bottom of the hill and got hold of Reuben to find out which apartment was his.   He was living with 4 English guys who all seemed pretty cool and in my experience with the English they like to drink a beer or 2.   We took off back up the gondola to a bar where Reuben’s instructor class were having a dinner to celebrate passing section 1 of their course.   I blended in with the class and enjoyed some dinner and a few beers.

Afterwards we each got a bottle of cider from the local liquor store and headed to some guys place in Reuben’s apartment building.   Everyone there seemed to have an English accent besides Reuben and me.   As we were leaving I sneakily tucked a bottle of Malibu into my snowboarding jacket that was sitting on the kitchen counter, and we set off to check out the big white night life.   As we walked up the hill we passed around the stolen bottle of Malibu until it was empty.  

The rest of the night is a blur to me but Reuben told me I tried to fight the manager of a bar and got kicked out.   I remember saying to Reuben “can I punch that guy in the face?”   It turned out the guy was one of Reuben’s snowboarding teachers.  

In the morning one of Reuben’s flat mates had a cut across the bridge of his nose.   He then proceeded to tell us while walking home from the bar he saw a huge pile snow up against a building leading to a deck.   He got up on the deck walked into the apartment the deck belonged too and sat down on the sofa.   All of a sudden the owner walked out to find this random English guy sitting on her couch and went ballistic.   In the panic he ran out and dove off the deck head first landing one story down on his face.   Could have been worst I suppose.

That morning I was so hangover it could have gone down as one of my worst.   Everyone was slow to move but eventually we gathered our shit and we went to get breakfast.

Me, Reuben and one of his flat mates who was a skier decided to head up.   These two clearly knew big white well and we went off the beaten path and on a few trails that not too many people had been riding that day.   Fresh snow was everywhere.    As the day progressed I wasn’t feeling any better I think it was one of my worst days riding ever.   I felt so shit and my reactions weren’t exactly the quickest which makes it hard when you have to avoid trees.  

Eventually the chairlift lines got to big to handle and we headed back down to Reuben’s apartment.   I packed my shit, said my goodbyes and took off back to Rossland.         

It was definitely an epic weekend, I loved riding there but wish I didn’t get so shit faced and had a crap second day.   Oh well I guess I’ll have to go back.